Check Please: From Gatekeeping to Guardianship in Leadership

Early in my leadership journey, I was leading a design walkthrough with my team. They were presenting an eLearning module they had worked hard on and were ready to release. The work was solid, but as I watched, I noticed issues with the level of interaction. I had been clear about my expectations, and in that moment, I felt disappointed and impatient.

The meeting ended in a verbal altercation between me and one of my team members. It was the lowest point of my leadership journey, and I never forgot it. I apologized, and I learned. To this day, that memory is my anchor when I feel myself getting so caught up in excellence that I forget the humanity and the awesome power that comes with leadership.

That lesson has stayed close, often resurfacing when I find myself thinking about power and how easily it can be misused. While listening to Cardi B’s latest album Am I the Drama?, one track, “Check Please,” reminded me that leadership, like fame, can test how we hold power once we have it.

The song is full of bravado and control, but underneath the confidence is something worth examining: what we do when we finally have authority. Because power itself is not the problem. How we use it determines everything.

Here are three leadership lessons to consider.

1. Start with the Mirror, Stay Curious About Your Impact

Lyric cue: “They checking for me, but I’m checking myself.”

When I first started leading, I cared a lot about being seen. I wanted people to notice that I was good at what I did, that I had earned my seat at the table. Over time, I learned that leadership is not about how many people check for you. It is about how often you check yourself.

This lyric is the reminder every leader needs. It is easy to get caught up in recognition, people looking to you for direction, validation, or approval. But checking yourself is the harder, more necessary work. It means being honest when your tone gets short, your patience wears thin, or your ego starts leading the meeting instead of your purpose.

What to do:

• Build regular feedback loops with your team and peers so truth never gets lost in hierarchy.
• Ask once a month, “How does my leadership feel to you right now?” and listen without defending.
• Identify one peer who can tell you the truth and challenge your blind spots. Give them explicit permission to be honest about how your leadership feels on the other side of your decisions.

The most grounded leaders stay curious about their impact. They do not assume their leadership feels good just because their intentions are good.

🎤 Mic drop moment: The mirror is a more powerful leadership tool than the microphone.

2. Guard the Standard, Not the Door

Lyric cue: “You can’t sit with us if you don’t bring something to the table.”

This lyric made me think about how easy it is for leaders to confuse protecting excellence with protecting access. I have been guilty of this. When standards are high and the pressure to deliver is real, it can be tempting to pull back, to decide who is ready and who is not, or to only trust a few people to get things right.

But leadership is not about keeping the table small. It is about helping people grow into their seat. When we build walls around excellence, we create dependency instead of development. When we share it, we create capability.

What to do:

• Turn your high standards into teachable moments. Show your team what “good” looks like instead of assuming they know.
• Before you say no to a new idea or dismiss someone’s work, ask yourself if you are protecting the goal or protecting your comfort. If it is the latter, you are gatekeeping, not leading.
• Share the “why” behind your standards so others see them as growth, not gatekeeping.

Leadership is not about guarding the power that got you here. It is about creating conditions for others to stand in their own.

🎤 Mic drop moment: Great leaders don’t just raise the bar. They teach others how to reach it.

3. Lead with Intention, Not Impulse

Lyric cue: “Run me my check.”

In “Check Please,” Cardi B makes it clear that she knows her worth. She demands what she has earned and refuses to settle for less. That kind of confidence can be powerful, but in leadership, power is not something to protect. It is something to practice with purpose.

Every decision you make, every word you say, and every silence you keep has weight. The real work is learning how to use that weight wisely. I have learned that power used carelessly can break trust faster than any big mistake. It is not the one dramatic moment that defines you as a leader. It is the hundred small choices that either build safety or erode it.

What to do:

• Before reacting, take one full breath and ask, “What does this moment require of me?” It will almost always slow you down enough to choose clarity over control.
• Give away small decisions intentionally. Let your team own outcomes that do not need your signature. It builds trust and reminds everyone, including you, that power is shared.
• Practice power reflection at the end of each week. Keep a few examples of key conversations or decisions and share them with the peer you chose in Lesson 1. Ask, “Did my words create more fear or more freedom?”

Leadership is not about how much influence you hold. It is about whether people feel safe when you use it.

🎤 Mic drop moment: Power handled with care does not shrink your influence. It strengthens your impact.

Final Thoughts

Cardi B’s “Check Please” may sound like a victory lap, but for leaders, it is a mirror. It asks a harder question: What do you do once you have power? Do you use it to build trust, or do you use it to build walls?

Every day, we make choices that reveal what kind of leader we are. Not the big, public ones, but the quiet, consistent ones that shape how people experience our presence.

Power will always test us. But if we stay curious, check ourselves often, and lead with care, we turn that test into a testimony.

Leadership is an awesome responsibility. Let’s treat it that way.

TL;DR:

• Power without reflection becomes control.
• Power with reflection becomes care.
• Great leaders do not guard the mic. They make sure others are heard.